nyota_uhura24 | [Too Cool Verse - Because It's Been Too Long]

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[Too Cool Verse - Because It's Been Too Long]

Nyota wasn't supposed to be sitting alone in her quarters drinking yet another glass of red wine. In fact, she wasn't supposed to be alone at all, but Leo was spending the night in sickbay again, which meant that their plans to have dinner and actually spend some time together were postponed. She'd told him that she would wait in his quarters, but as time passed she decided she'd rather be in her own. She could message Chrissy or Scotty, but at the moment she didn't feel like seeing anyone. Even though she needed and wanted to sleep, it was almost impossible without him there. Time spent sleeping beside each other was really the only time they had together these days, and there wasn't nearly enough of it.

I need to learn to sleep on my own again, she thought morosely, because at this rate she was going to end up too exhausted to actually function. Glancing at the bed she barely spent any time in did nothing to lift her mood. They normally slept in Leo's quarters, and the idea of sleeping alone in her bed again was not at all appealing. She had a PADD in her other hand, and with a sigh tried to get her mind to focus on reports instead of Leo. He'd become such a fundamental part of her life, but M'Benga's illness meant that they were lucky to have even a few waking minutes together. They'd both always been busy, but before they still had time to be together. Nothing could make her stop loving him, but she was frustrated and tired, and she missed him terribly.

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McCoy was so tired he could barely see straight. He'd worked 7 shifts in the past four days and that was just the beginning. He honestly couldn't even remember the last time he had more than half an hour to talk to Nyota and it killed him, but he had to do his job. M'Benga was sick. There was nothing he could do but cover for him. He ran a hand softly through his hair as he walked into his quarters last night and called out for her, looking forward to talking to her for a little bit before crashing. M'Benga was covering a double the next day so that he could have his first day off in a month and that meant he could sleep as long as he wanted that night (and actually see Uhura, to bit).

"Nyota? Darlin', I'm home," he called out. No answer.

Where in God's name is she? It's almost 23:00 and she said she'd be here...

The fact that Nyota wasn't in his quarters as usual worried him. He slipped back into his shoes and headed towards her quarters, just in case, hoping she would be there and he wouldn't have to go on an adventure to find her. He punched the access code into her door and walked into the main room, sighing a little sigh of relief as he saw her sitting on the couch with her PADD and a glass of wine.

"Hey there, darlin'," he said as he pushed his shoes off of his feet. "How are ya? I thought ya said you'd be back at my place tonight?"

When the door to her quarters slid open a little after 23:00, she glanced up a little morosely. Seeing him always made her heart feel lighter and happier, but at the moment the feeling was tinged with bitterness and just a little bit of guilt because she did tell him that she'd wait in his quarters. She knew it wasn't his fault that he'd been so busy, but that did nothing to improve her mood. “You're actually off before midnight,” she greeted him, voice tired and rather toneless. “I'm sorry, I assumed it would be later.” Because it almost always was. She glanced down at the wine and tried to remind herself that she really should just be happy he was there and not upset about something that wasn't his fault to begin with. "How was shift?"

McCoy's bright smile at seeing her diminished a bit as she snapped an answer a little, her tone disinterested already. "I know, darlin', but I tried my best to get home to ya as soon as I could. You know that." He took a familiar seat on the couch beside her and relaxed into the couch, running a hand across his face with a sigh. "Shift was shift. Nothing too interesting, but never a slow enough minute for me to take a break," he said, the exhaustion clear in his voice. "How was yours?" he asked, turning his head to look at her, searching for eye contact. It was unlike his girlfriend to be so stand offish, and he wondered if she'd had a bad day at work or something.

"I know," she replied shortly, feeling even more frustrated that she wasn't being more understanding. Her anger wasn't really directed at him, but she couldn't seem to shut it off when it felt it could be days before they'd even have this much time together again. "It was all right," she answered when he asked about work, swirling the wine in her glass and then finally glancing over at him. "Though if you want to know about shift yesterday, it was uneventful. The two days before that were wonderful - we perfected a new way to track subspace anomalies. If you want to know about my week outside of work, it was pretty awful."

His frown deepened and he shifted his body towards hers a bit more. McCoy's eyes glimmered with concern as he nodded. "Of course I want to know. Why wouldn't I want to know? What's wrong, darlin'?" He didn't quite know exactly what to say, but judging by the look on her face and her tone with him, the problem had something to do with him. Perhaps he hadn't been asking her enough lately? "Nyota, sweetheart, just because I've been busy the past couple of weeks doesn't mean I don't care what's going on in your life. You can always talk to me..." he tried to reassure her, reaching a hand over to brush his fingers across the back of her hand.

The way he caressed her hand reminded her of how kind and thoughtful he always was, and she tangled their fingers together, trying to let him know that being upset didn't change how she felt about him. "I know, mpenzi, but I can't exactly talk to you when I never see you. And when I do see you we're both too tired to actually talk about anything anyway." Huffing a breath and taking another sip of the wine in an attempt to calm herself, she continued, "I know you can't always control your schedule, and of course I don't want you to neglect your duties, but I think this is the first time we've said more than three words to each other in weeks." Explaining just made her more frustrated with both herself and the situation.

He traced his thumb across the back of her hand as she laced their fingers together and he looked down at his feet. "Well it's not like there's anything I can do about it! When another officer is sick and I'm the only one qualified to replace him on a shift, I have no choice. M'Benga's getting better. He's taking his first shift tomorrow which means I actually have the day off! We have the next..." he paused to glance at his watch. "...thirty-two hours at our disposal and you can talk to me about whatever you want. You know my schedule isn't usually this intensive. It will go back to normal!" McCoy tightened his grip on her hand a little. "I miss you, too, you know. I don't like not seeing you every day, it screws up my inner clock." It wasn't that he didn't have the same feelings Nyota had, he was just trying to be positive about it rather than dwelling on how rough it was.

The worst part of listening to him defend his actions was that she knew he was right; she couldn't blame him for doing his job, and part of what she loved about him was how devoted he was to it. None of that changed the fact that she was tired and upset and needed him to know about it. But then he was telling her that it screwed up his internal clock to not see her, and her eyes widened marginally, the words making her heart flutter in spite of how long they'd been together. It was a relief to be reminded that she was as essential to him as he was to her. "I know this isn't your fault, Leo. It's just hard not seeing you. You... you know how hard it is for me to sleep when you're not around." She took a slightly shuddered breath and squeezed his hand, eyes fixing on her lap. "And God do I hate sounding this needy."

McCoy was well aware of how hard it was for Nyota because he was going through the same thing. One point she made, though, did hit him a little hard. He'd forgotten completely that she had a hard time sleeping without him. It must be really difficult to have to feel alone AND not be able to sleep. Leonard let go of her hand so that he could slip his strong arm around her shoulders and press a kiss to her temple. "Darlin', I'm sorry you've been having sleep troubles lately. I really do understand. It's going to get easier though, things will fall back into place." He sighed softly and whispered against her ear. "It's okay for you to be needy around me. It's what I'm here for."

When he put his arm around her she leaned against him, drawing strength from his embrace and nodding weakly when he assured her that things were going to get easier. At least M'Benga was finally getting better, which was a relief on several levels. As he whispered against her ear she turned her head to nuzzle a little against him. "I'm a little scared of how much I need you," she admitted, still not completely comfortable with feeling this vulnerable. "Barely seeing you this last month was so much more difficult than I expected it to be..." She sighed again, feeling drained and frustrated. "And I know the last month hasn't been easy for you either. I should be supportive instead of upset, but I've missed you so much mpenzi."

"You're plenty supportive, darlin', you don't need to worry about that." He sighed again and nodded. "I've missed you, too, Nyota." He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, trying to get her to calm down just a little, at least enough to come back to his quarters with him because they both knew his bed was more comfortable. McCoy knew it was hard for Nyota to open up to him like that and he appreciated the fact that she wasn't already running away from the feelings that just kept intensifying with every breath he took. "I love you, sweetheart," he added. He ran a hand along her jaw and looked her in the eyes again for the first time in probably a week.

She returned the soft kiss, letting the feel of his arms around her remind her why he was the only one she could show her vulnerable side to. He would never judge her for it, but would always be there to hold her and comfort her and love her, even when he must be more exhausted than she was. "I love you too," she whispered, a smile playing at the corners of her lips as she looked into his eyes. Pressing another kiss to his lips, she added, "I know the circumstances were unavoidable, but you shouldn't have to work this hard. Every time I see you you're exhausted, so I didn't want to bother you with how much I missed you when you so obviously needed to sleep. But today I just..." She shook her head. "I'm really glad you're here."

He couldn't help but smile against her lips as they really kissed for the first time in a while. The familiar taste sent a slight chill down his spine as he realized that not even his utter exhaustion could actually curb his dire need for her. He traced his tongue gently along her bottom lip as she kissed him again and lifted his hand a bit more to sift his fingers softly through her hair. " I know, darlin', I know, but let me tell ya somethin'. It doesn't matter how exhausted I am or how long I've been working: when I come home, I'm home and 100% with you. You can always talk to me, besides, when I'm in that much need of sleep, another half an hour isn't going to worsen the situation at all..." McCoy smiled and nodded. "I'm really glad I'm here, too."

He pulled her a little closer, letting her rest her head on his shoulder as he continued to run his fingers through her luscious, brown locks. He sat like this for a few minutes, just relishing in the feel of her curled up against him, something he hadn't enjoyed in far too long. When he realized his eyes were starting to droop, he shook his head out of it a little and turned his face to hers once more. "What do you say we make ourselves a little more comfortable?" he asked, implying that they find a bed.

She melted into the kiss as he traced her lip with his tongue, pressing her mouth more firmly to his as his fingers slid through her hair. Even if this was all they had the energy to do she still felt some of her tension ease away. Returning the kiss slowly but deeply, she shifted a little closer and caressed his knuckles with her thumb. “I know,” she whispered when he reassured her that he'd always be there for her. “You've always been here for me. And I'm always here for you, no matter how busy and tired and stressed we are.” She kissed him again, sighing contentedly when he pulled her closer so she could rest her head on his shoulder. Even just being beside him like this was a huge comfort.

She almost wanted to simply stay here and soak up the feeling of being snuggled against him and knowing how deeply they loved each other, but when he suggested they find someplace more comfortable she couldn't deny that it was a good idea. Kissing his cheek, she murmured, “Want to go back to your room? I'm sorry I wasn't there earlier...” She did feel guilty, but as always his primary concern was making sure she was all right rather than getting upset.

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[Too Cool Verse - Because It's Been Too Long]

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